The holiday season is often seen as a time of joy, connection, and celebration. But for those grieving the loss of a loved one, it can feel heavy, overwhelming, and even isolating. The traditions, social expectations, and festive atmosphere can magnify feelings of sadness or longing.
If you’re navigating grief this holiday season, know that you’re not alone. In a recent episode of How the Wise One Grows, I had the privilege of speaking with grief therapist Litsa Williams, co-founder of What’s Your Grief. Together, we explored why the holidays can feel particularly challenging and how to find ways to navigate them with compassion and care.
Why Are the Holidays So Hard After Loss?
The holidays bring layers of expectations—both from ourselves and others. We often feel pressure to celebrate, maintain traditions, and put on a happy face. But grief doesn’t take a holiday.
Litsa explains that the holidays can feel especially heavy because they emphasize connection and togetherness, which might make the absence of a loved one more pronounced. Traditions may feel empty or painful, and navigating social gatherings can be emotionally draining.
The key is to acknowledge these feelings rather than push them aside. By honoring your emotions, you can start to approach the season in a way that feels more authentic to you.
Tips for Coping with Grief During the Holidays
In our conversation, Litsa shared actionable tips to help grievers navigate the holidays:
1. Identify Your “Why”
Before diving into holiday plans, take a moment to reflect on what matters most to you this season. What are your core values? Is it connection, honoring memories, or finding quiet time to reflect? Understanding your "why" can help guide the “what” and “how” of your holiday experience.
2. Redefine Traditions
Traditions can be a source of comfort, but they can also feel heavy if they remind you of your loss. Give yourself permission to create new traditions or adapt old ones. For example, light a candle in honor of your loved one, or host a smaller, quieter celebration that feels more aligned with your needs.
3. Communicate Your Needs
Grief can make it hard to navigate social interactions, especially when others may not understand what you’re going through. Be open about your boundaries and needs. Whether it’s skipping an event or asking for help with a task, clear communication can make a big difference.
4. Prepare Yourself for Difficult Moments
The holidays are filled with triggers—whether it’s a song, a smell, or a tradition. By acknowledging these potential challenges ahead of time, you can create a plan for how to cope when they arise.
5. Give Yourself Permission to Feel
Grief doesn’t mean you can’t experience joy, and joy doesn’t mean you’re forgetting your loved one. Embrace the full range of emotions that may come up during the season—both the light and the heavy.
Grieving during the holidays isn’t easy, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. By honoring your feelings, redefining traditions, and staying connected to what matters most, you can find comfort and meaning during this challenging time.
Let’s move through this season together, one step—and one breath—at a time. đź’›
What’s your biggest challenge during the holidays? Share your thoughts in the comments or tag me on Instagram @HollyZajur. I’d love to hear your story.
Listen to the Full Episode
For a deeper dive into these tips and more, tune into my conversation with Litsa Williams on How the Wise One Grows. You’ll find actionable advice, heartfelt insights, and compassionate guidance to help you through this holiday season.
🎧 Listen to the episode here
Additional Resources
- Learn more about Litsa Williams and What’s Your Grief: WhatsYourGrief.com
- Purchase the book What's Your Grief: Lists to Help You Through Any Loss
