Mindfulness Meditation: Break Free from People-Pleasing Patterns (68)

Hi everyone and welcome back to how the Wise One Grows. I want to take a moment today to first give a shout out to our newest Dream Team members, hannah and Lee. Hannah and Lee recently joined the Dream Team in the spirit of Dana, which is giving from the heart. When you join the Dream Team, you help to create stable funding for this podcast to exist, in this space of connection for one another to exist, and one of the roots is to support the community as well. So, thanks to Hannah and Lee and the other members of the Dream Team, this month we were able to make donations to support the Hawaii Community Foundation and Hawaii Wildfire after the recent wildfires in Maui. I also encourage you to consider making a direct donation to these organizations as well, and if this podcast has been impactful in your life in any way, it would mean the world if you would consider joining the Dream Team as well, for as little as $3 a month. And if you don't have the financial capacity to support, you can also practice Dana by sharing an episode you love with a friend and giving us a review on your favorite streaming platform. Thank you for listening and allowing this podcast to exist so we can keep meeting ourselves, one another and the natural world with compassion. I'm really excited to share today's meditation with you, based on episode 67, where we spoke with therapist Justine Carino about people pleasing. So in that episode, some of the key components we talked about were understanding the roots of people pleasing and why we do it. I think this is really key to help us cultivate compassion for where our people pleasing patterns come from and for ourselves in that process. We also focused on the importance of learning how to listen to what it is you actually want, in need, and then the ability to be with the discomfort of naming your needs and setting boundaries, while remaining rooted in your core values as you do so. So today's meditation is going to kind of walk us through how we can work with each of these components. I can already tell you this is probably an episode I am going to be listening to again and again. In the show notes there's the stamper for when this meditation begins, so you can download this episode and listen to it every day, whenever you need, whenever you feel those people pleasing patterns sneaking in or maybe some resentment boiling up. So, if you haven't already done so, find a space that feels safe and supported for you and we'll get started. So just start to use your sense of sight to notice where you are right now. Just get familiar with where you are right here right now, gently pulling yourself out of the head into this now moment and, if it feels safe for you, if you aren't driving, you can gently rest your eyes or soften your gaze at a point in front of you and bring your awareness to where your body touches the earth. Let yourself be held by the earth beneath you, know that it has you here, know that you're supported, know that you're held, and notice where in the body you feel the breath and take a big breath in and a big breath out and inhale, exhale One more like this, inhale and exhale. I want you to take a moment to just notice what's alive for you right now, notice what you feel. So take a moment to gently scan your body, from the tip of your head to the tips of your toe, and just get curious about the sensations present. Just notice how the body feels right now. And I now invite you to ask yourself what do you want and what do you need right now? Don't think too much about it, just notice the first thing that comes to mind here and now we're going to scan the body from head to toe again, asking the body the same question what do you need right now? So, gently, scan the body from head to toe again and ask each part what do you need right now? Not judging what it has to say, just listening to it and offering it that which it needs for a few breaths. Gives some money to help folks get some of that money back. So, full, full full, now that you've started to get familiar with what you need and what you want right now, I want you to practice saying it. Maybe it's out loud to yourself, or maybe you repeat what you want and need right now to yourself and your mind. But again ask yourself what do you want and what do you need right now, and repeat that answer three times. Allow yourself to first get comfortable noticing what you need and then naming it. And as you do this, notice if there's any discomfort that arises and that's okay, don't judge it. You're practicing something new, so it's normal for discomfort to arise. It doesn't mean it's wrong. It means you're building a new muscle and if you notice any discomfort, don't resist it. Instead, can you sit with it. Can you be with discomfort? Can you breathe with discomfort here? Perhaps you can find some place to soften around it, maybe soften around the edges of what feels uncomfortable, or within it, or maybe that discomfort is just going to be uncomfortable and that's okay. Can you find another space that feels steady and brings ease within the body? Can you bring your attention there to include both in the totality of your experience here? Can you bring your attention there to include both in the totality of your experience here? Can you bring your attention there to include both in the totality of your experience here? So for me, I'm repeating that I am worthy of rest, I am loved, I am enough. So repeat that phrase or core value, or offer yourself that thing that you need, that thing that you want here. Know that you're worthy of it. Then return to your connection of the body to the earth. Know that you can come back to this sensation of studying it as you step into your fullness, as you move through the rest of your day and beyond. Let's take one more breath together and through the nose and out through the mouth, and you can slowly open your eyes as you return to this space.